Now, when I post, people listen! I’ve noticed that since I started thinking about what I write (and posting funnier and more hilarious Facebook status updates) my friends have suddenly become more talkative – they ‘like’ my statuses very often (and comment on them), which means that the next time they log on they see more info from my home feed! That’s good news for me, and it means I can stay in touch with more of my Facebook friends!

So, what golden nuggets do I have on this Saturday evening? I decided to pick some great Facebook status quotes which you can use as your own – and which I can guarantee will have a lasting effect on your online popularity! Either that, or will make a few people chuckle at your wit and humour. Either way, everyone’s happy!

Funny Facebook statuses

Saturday’s funny Facebook status – Number 1 – Practice what your preach!

Example: Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

I used to have a doctor, and he said that you should never put anything smaller than your elbow into your ear to clean it. I think he was joking, but he did have the hairiest ears I’d ever seen, so I’m not sure. It was a case of practising what you preach, and I believe almost 100% in it! I used to work as an editor in a magazine, and there is nothing more frustrating than not proofreading correctly – and there’s nothing funnier (or should that be punnier?) than putting a mistake in your Facebook status and making people laugh about it!

Saturday’s funny Facebook status – Number 2 – The truer the better

Example: A fool and his money are soon partying.

Sadly, this clever Facebook status is a perfect representation of my life. As soon as my paycheck hits my account, it’s already spent on rent, bills, clothes, alcohol…but that’s nothing that a witty Facebook status can’t fix! Playing on the old phrase ‘a fool and his money are soon parted’, this classic Facebook quote is great for reminding people that we’re here for a good time, not a long time.

Saturday’s funny Facebook status – Number 3 – Clever or die!

Example: A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

Ok so this might be a really witty Facebook status update or it might be a complete failure – it really depends on your target audience. I wrote this on the notice board of my office the other day, and more than 50% of the staff said either ‘what does that mean?’ or ‘I don’t get it’. That’s ok though, because you can just sit in the moral majority and smile smugly as you work out who your intelligent friends are and who the dunces are…it won’t be hard!

Saturday’s funny Facebook status – Number 4 – Make ‘em laugh!

Example: I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.

Final status, final pun – it’s direct, it’s funny and it’s one that needs repeating 100 times! I think that I might do a whole series on this type of pun – the double meaning, one-liner jokes which fit perfectly into the category of funny Facebook status! I have a colleague at work who does nothing but try to fit this type of witty one-liner into his everyday speech, but unfortunately he always leaves slightly too much of a time-gap before he says anything…so everyone knows he’s about to drop a joke! Well, you don’t need to be so obvious! Paste it today!

Well, that’s all for this Saturday night – I know that the ‘FB generation’ don’t really spend too much time online over the weekend, so I look forward to you visiting next week and trying to fill your time with thinking up more funny Facebook statuses!

When people log in to Facebook, they now have access to a ‘Home feed’ page, which gives updates about what all of their friends are doing, watching, listening to and enjoy. This list of information can be filtered and personalised, but the key point is that if you leave a funny facebook status update, people will see it.

There are several types of Funny Facebook status that you might choose to put into your message bar. Let’s have a look at the different breeds of status here:

Funny Facebook status

The cool Facebook status
Often people will try to make their status update cool by adding special characters or information – small symbols which will often grab the attention of the reader and make them think that what they are seeing is special and make them ask ‘how can I have that in my update message too?’.

Example: Danny is cle’a[ni.ng hi's ke]yb36oa;rd

The funny Facebook status
Jokes are an extremely popular thing to put into Facebook status messages. In this site we will be giving you many Facebook ideas and information about which jokes work best and which jokes are the most popular.

Example: Why don’t aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

The philosophical Facebook status
Perhaps you want to quote a famous thinker, a movie star or a politician? This site will give you the most amazing quotes from brains around the world. Whether you’re reflecting on the past or thinking about the future, philosophical and clever Facebook statuses will be a great addition to your page!

Example: A man with one watch knows what time it is; a man with two watches is never quite sure. ~Lee Segall

The witty Facebook status
A short line which looks normal enough, but actually includes some sort of pun or double meaning! These are some of the most popular Facebook statuses because they are short, to the point, make people smile and don’t waste time!

Example: “If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?”

The romantic Facebook status
People often use Facebook to communicate and chat with people that they love – and are often far away from. This includes family members, friends and of course – girlfriends and boyfriends. This means that sometimes a romantic Facebook status update is the best way to let the one that you love and care for know that you want them.

Example: One word frees us / Of all the weight and pain in life / That word is Love ~ Socrates

So, there are the major categories of Facebook status, and an introduction to what Facebook statuses exactly are…or what they should be. In the coming weeks you will find many different status updates for Facebook, and lots of ideas for you to create your own ones and share them with us!