Halloween was a huge deal in my house, because my parents didn’t really get into the swing of Easter and Christmas. Halloween, however, (one of the most manufactured of all of the public holidays (except maybe Valentine’s day)) was a time when they really let their hair down (well actually my mother let her hair down, my Dad was bald) and partied.

They would send us off into town on trick or treat missions to get as much candy, chocolate, sweets and snacks from unsuspecting neighbours as possible – and then they would confiscate it from us when we got back (but they always left us enough time to gorge ourselves stupid and nearly die of sugar shock). Anyway…

Halloween is a time to get together, and I’m sure you’ll be spending even more time on Facebook chat with your friends, so let’s get down to the status updates and ideas, shall we?

Halloween funny Facebook status ideas

Funny Facebook status idea number one: Remix the traditional

Example: Eat, drink and be scary.

Playing on one of the most popular Christmas phrases of all time, this topical Facebook status can get people chuckling to themselves as they carve out their pumpkins for jack o’lanterns (or whatever other preparations they happen to be doing). Just make sure you’re not the one who they’re coming to give the frights to!

Funny Facebook status idea number two: Family values

Example: A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.

There were always certain people who we knew would never give us any treats on Halloween night. One of those was an old man whose wife had died years before, and he seemed to get grumpier every day of his existence. One night we went to his house and knocked on the door – “TRICK OR TREAT?!”. He opened up and shouted “I’ve got a treat for your asses!” and ran out chasing us with a baseball bat! Needless to say, his windows got a good coat of egg later that night.

Funny Facebook status idea number three: Scent of an (evil) woman

Example: Ghosts, like ladies, never speak till spoke to.

Ladies, in this case, does not mean ‘the female of the species’ but more the ‘well refined women’ of the upper classes. What it means is, people who are haunted (and it seems people realize that they’re haunted a lot more around this time of year) usually are for a reason – and the reason is usually not a positive one!

Funny Facebook status idea number four: Haunting stuff

Example: They that are born on Halloween shall see more than other folk.

Is it true that people who are born on Halloween night are bound to become vessels for the thoughts and messages of the spirit world? Probably not. But it’s always good to remind people who are born on that day that they are probably evil to the core and haunted. The least it will do is annoy them!

Funny Facebook status idea number five: Get funky

Example: HALLOWEEN! ☾☆☂☁☹☠☽

Ok, it’s not perfect, but all of these symbols can, in some way, be related to Halloween and the different practices within it. The skull and crossbones is probably the best MSN symbol to use at this time of year to really get people in the mood for witchcraft and the black arts. Try them out!

Well, that’s all the Facebook statuses you need for Halloween and maybe beyond. If you can think of any other funny Facebook status ideas for Halloween, let us know in the comments!

There are many different places to find amusing Facebook update ideas, but most of them consist of actually talking about your daily, mundane life. As much as you might be tempted to go down this route, stop yourself! You don’t want to be constantly reminding people that your life has nothing better in it than playing World of Warcraft and eating pizza! Actually, if you play World of Warcraft, you’d probably not stop long enough to update your Facebook status message…

Anyway, today we will go through a few different ideas for your update message, and you can choose to copy and paste them from here or simply adapt them to your own situation. Most are based on common phrases or sayings, and then made funny using a pun or witty turn – you’ll see!

Some funny Facebook status ideas

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 1 – Unholy matrimony

Example: Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

I will probably be single all of my life. Not because I’m unloveable (although some might disagree), but because of the pain and heartache caused when you have to plan a wedding. The flowers, the guests, the placings, the music, the vows, the rings…all of that romantic rubbish and we haven’t even started on the honeymoon yet! This great witty Facebook status solves one of the great mysteries of life – what you get when you cross firearms, women and a pun. You guessed it! A shotgun wedding!

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 2 – Dry-mouthed humour

Example: A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

When I arrived in the office this morning, a number of my colleagues (who had changed their Facebook status updates last night to ‘let’s go out and get waaaaasted!!’) were looking a little worse for wear. This type of funny Facebook status idea is great when you are feeling a little hungover, but you don’t want the world to know exactly how it happened. It is also, of course, a funny pun on the ‘Grapes of Wrath’ too!.

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 3 – Egg heads unite

Example: I’m not bald, it’s a solar panel for sex.

This is a perfect funny Facebook status idea for those who are challenged ‘up top’. I don’t mean they have no brains, but maybe the grass which covers the head is a little too well mown…the bald! My Dad always used to say this to people when they mentioned his receding, thinning (or finally) bald head, and it would always provoke a laugh!

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 4 – Any excuse for staying low

Example: Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines

I’m not saying that I’m a weasel, but they are not the most stupid animals. They don’t have a good reputation around the animal kingdom (or human kingdom, for that matter), but they just do their thing and never put their head up above the firing line. People are the same, and this great funny Facebook idea is one which you can use again and again to remind people about the perils of trying to be the superstar of all superstars!

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 5 – The king of the office

Example: Don’t use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice

This is perhaps one of my favourite puns, and is perfect for the academic environment. It’s easy to find examples of contradictions in the jargon spewed forth in corporations around the world, and this example is a really sweet little number. Diminutive, of course, means ‘small’, so what begins as an order form on high turns into a funny Facebook status idea that will make people click LIKE faster than a hare in a tortoise race!

So, there you have some fresh ideas, try to brighten up your Facebook account today so you don’t become one of the boring people who talk about eating pizza and watching TV all day! Remember, if you ever need any more funny Facebook status ideas, get straight back here and find them!

So I needed a plan, and now I’m going to share this with you – how you can find hundreds of funny Facebook status ideas and make sure that you never have to write stupid drivel in your update message any more! Sounds good, right? Here are four different ways to spice up your statuses!

Facebook status idea number 1 – Think about your faults

Example: Steve is colour blind and thinks trying to solve a Rubik’s cube is pretty difficult…

In this case, Steve is colour blind (he sees everything not just in black and white but in varying shades of grey). A Rubik’s cube is, of course, very colourful (it usually has a red side, white side, blue side, green side, yellow side and orange side – but they can vary depending on which design you choose). The point is, if you do have some little problem or issue, you shouldn’t be embarrassed or try to hide it – you should laugh about it! It will make other people laugh too!

Facebook status idea number 2 – Think about quotes relevant to your life

Example: One man’s quiet is another man’s din.

I used to live in a small apartment in central London. We had neighbours on both sides, and also above and below. This caused a number of problems, including frequent complaints about the volume of my music (I did like to play some hip-hop from time to time, quite loud). The point was, that I loved that music – but the people who lived nearby did not. The quote in the Facebook status above is extremely relevant to this situation, and that means that it will make people who read it interested and probably ask you ‘what is that all about’?! That will lead to people ‘liking’ your status and will lead to comments and conversation – which is exactly what a funny Facebook status is all about! Funny Facebook status quotes are cool!

Facebook status idea number 3 – Try some keyboard tricks

Example: Steve ¡ǝɯıʇ ǝɯɐs ǝɥʇ ʇɐ ʞooqǝɔɐɟ ǝsn puɐ puɐʇspuɐɥ ɐ op ʎןןɐuıɟ uɐɔ

You might be a little confused when you read about this funny Facebook status idea – try looking at the text upside down! Is that cool? I think so! There are ways to write all text upside down, whatever you want (I will write a post later which includes information about exactly how to write text upside down in Facebook) – and you can come up with a huge amount of funny status comments! This one, the correct way up, says ‘Steve can finally do a handstand and use facebook at the same time!’ – but I’m sure you’ll be able to come up with a huge number of your own stauses!

Facebook status idea number 4 – More keyboard tricks and hoaxes

Example: Steve is uploading a virus ████████████ 83%

There are loads of keyboard tricks that you can use in your Facebook status – funny, cool, crazy and strange. Check this one out – it’s a hoax which can trick your friends into thinking that you’re uploading a virus into their account and they can’t do anything about it! Obviously, you’re not really uploading anything – but it looks that way! That’s one of the coolest keyboard tricks I know of, but I’m sure you can come up with more (you can change the text to say anything you want – maybe just ‘loading’ or ‘downloading sexy movies’!). Anyway, experiment, try your own, but overall just have fun with them!

Well, that’s it. The bottom line regarding your messages to your friends on Facebook is to be creative, to think about what you’re writing and to make an effort to not just write frequently, but to also try to make your friends think about what you’re writing! It’s meant to be a fun form of communication, so try to make it exactly that!

Remember the four big funny Facebook status ideas – faults, quotes and keyboard tricks. Go for it!