Archive for September, 2009

More funny Facebook status ideas

Everyone needs funny Facebook status ideas. I don’t mean that people don’t have enough imagination – everyone has (at least a little bit) of that, but for people (like me) who class themselves as ‘professional’ Facebook users (by that I mean we spend most of our days online!), I feel like sometimes you just can’t come up with Facebook status updates at will (without a little help).

There are many different places to find amusing Facebook update ideas, but most of them consist of actually talking about your daily, mundane life. As much as you might be tempted to go down this route, stop yourself! You don’t want to be constantly reminding people that your life has nothing better in it than playing World of Warcraft and eating pizza! Actually, if you play World of Warcraft, you’d probably not stop long enough to update your Facebook status message…

Anyway, today we will go through a few different ideas for your update message, and you can choose to copy and paste them from here or simply adapt them to your own situation. Most are based on common phrases or sayings, and then made funny using a pun or witty turn – you’ll see!

Some funny Facebook status ideas

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 1 – Unholy matrimony

Example: Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

I will probably be single all of my life. Not because I’m unloveable (although some might disagree), but because of the pain and heartache caused when you have to plan a wedding. The flowers, the guests, the placings, the music, the vows, the rings…all of that romantic rubbish and we haven’t even started on the honeymoon yet! This great witty Facebook status solves one of the great mysteries of life – what you get when you cross firearms, women and a pun. You guessed it! A shotgun wedding!

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 2 – Dry-mouthed humour

Example: A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

When I arrived in the office this morning, a number of my colleagues (who had changed their Facebook status updates last night to ‘let’s go out and get waaaaasted!!’) were looking a little worse for wear. This type of funny Facebook status idea is great when you are feeling a little hungover, but you don’t want the world to know exactly how it happened. It is also, of course, a funny pun on the ‘Grapes of Wrath’ too!.

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 3 – Egg heads unite

Example: I’m not bald, it’s a solar panel for sex.

This is a perfect funny Facebook status idea for those who are challenged ‘up top’. I don’t mean they have no brains, but maybe the grass which covers the head is a little too well mown…the bald! My Dad always used to say this to people when they mentioned his receding, thinning (or finally) bald head, and it would always provoke a laugh!

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 4 – Any excuse for staying low

Example: Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines

I’m not saying that I’m a weasel, but they are not the most stupid animals. They don’t have a good reputation around the animal kingdom (or human kingdom, for that matter), but they just do their thing and never put their head up above the firing line. People are the same, and this great funny Facebook idea is one which you can use again and again to remind people about the perils of trying to be the superstar of all superstars!

Funny Facebook status ideas – Number 5 – The king of the office

Example: Don’t use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice

This is perhaps one of my favourite puns, and is perfect for the academic environment. It’s easy to find examples of contradictions in the jargon spewed forth in corporations around the world, and this example is a really sweet little number. Diminutive, of course, means ‘small’, so what begins as an order form on high turns into a funny Facebook status idea that will make people click LIKE faster than a hare in a tortoise race!

So, there you have some fresh ideas, try to brighten up your Facebook account today so you don’t become one of the boring people who talk about eating pizza and watching TV all day! Remember, if you ever need any more funny Facebook status ideas, get straight back here and find them!